Have you ever found yourself, wishing you had confidence? Or, dreaming about something you want, feeling like you're going to need a lot of confidence in order to achieve it?
Often, this can be the moment we give up. We interpret these thoughts as ‘proof’ we don’t have what it takes – not just confidence, but a lot of it. The beauty of working with a Life Coach is that these moments are transformed. Coaching enables you to find a different interpretation.
Firstly, if your mind is saying, you are going to need a lot of confidence to get ‘there’ – to finish writing that novel, to commit yourself to making enough art for an exhibition, or dedicate yourself to a new business venture – then now you know what you need.
Rather than hearing these thoughts and feeling discouraged, we can step back for a moment and observe: okay, here’s where I want to get to, and here’s what I'm going to need.
Many of the thoughts contained in our minds are related to our core evolutionary principle of staying alive. The brain works hard to analyse the outcomes of situations and act as a warning system. It may be that the mind looks at the consequence of writing a novel, understanding that then an agent has to be found, which leads to an anticipation of rejection.
‘You’re going to need a lot of confidence,’ it then says.
This stops you in your tracks. ‘Oh,’ you think. ‘I guess if that’s something I need, it means that I don’t have it.’
If you find yourself, putting off taking action towards achieving your dreams, it means that you have stuck by this interpretation, unable to see that this thought can be construed in a different way. This is one of the benefits of Creative Coaching. It teaches the skill of looking at life with several different lenses, so that you can find a perspective that really serves you and the dreams that you want to achieve.
How about taking this phrase, ‘you are going to need a lot of confidence,’ and, just for a moment, imagining you've been given a key to a door that leads to the life you want. You hold it in your hand – this one thing you need in order to achieve the happiness, or success, you’ve always wanted.
Rather than reading it as proof you don’t have what it takes, the phrase becomes a gift of the very thing you need.
It may be that you find yourself saying, ‘but I don’t have a lot of confidence. I just don’t.’
Let’s go back to the door and the key. How do you know a locked door needs a key? Well, we’ve all experienced that. We know what doors are, we know what keys are. We come across a locked door, so we look for the key.
So, the mind senses a locked door. On the other side is your dream. You’re going to need a key. How do you know the key is a lot of confidence?
Here’s the thing: we know because we’ve experienced it. Whatever resource a client of mine says they need to achieve their goal can only ever be a resource they know and have experience of – otherwise, how would they know they needed it?
So, we take a little time to remember. When was that moment in your life when you experienced confidence? Where were you? What were you doing?
Find that key. It lies within. You used it once, which is how your mind knows that this is exactly the key you need now.
I am here if you need help finding it.